My weight …

Well my scales have been broken for three days and I have avoided the temptation to buy a new battery. I have absolutely NO IDEA what I weigh. This is good, right?

I dont know … it’s as if over the last few days all I can think about is my new house and moving and how HAPPY I feel right now – and that has cancelled out so many of my negative feelings. Plus … I took in a parcel for a neighbour opposite (at the old house) today and when I saw her pull up in her car, I took the parcel out to her and we ended up having a really good chat! She’d noticed me loading up the car with lots of things over the week and I admitted that I was moving out with the children in just over a week. She laughed and told me she’d commented to her partner that “the woman over the road is looking really good these days!” She told me all about her nightmare divorce, how she had lost a butt load of weight afterwards and we had a good old natter! Funny where you find friends eh!

Well anyway, I HAVE been eating over the last few days. I’ve been having something at lunch and something in the evening. Okay it hasn’t been huge mega amounts, but it’s been more than before – and that is a breakthrough for me.

So being thinner doesn’t necessarily equal happy … but obviously ending my marriage and moving out does … sad huh. I STILL feel fat – don’t get me wrong… but I’ve promised myself all along that I will never starve myself and if I am hungry … I WILL eat. It just seems ironic that the closer I get to leaving this place (ie leaving my STBX husband) and moving into my own place … the less I am obsessed about food.

Or it isn’t irony and it’s just frigging obvious that HE has been the cause of all of my stress!!