After three and a half years of being “unhappily married”, I am technically starting my new life as a single mother from tonight! STBX has left … he’s got next week off work, so he’s packed up a bag and taken himself off on his motorbike to visit his family while we move out. I totally understand why he needs to do this and I support him in it. He does NOT want to be here when his family leave, and if I were in his shoes and it were him taking the kids, it would kill me to watch them leave. I’d do the same. He needs a few days to go be a single bloke, go do whatever it is that blokes do when they get divorced (probably nothing more than sitting having a quiet beer with his brother anyway!!)
Most of his close family is spread across a wide area so he’s pretty much doing a round trip over the next week. He’ll be back by Wednesday but I’ve said to him it’s more than fine if he doesn’t want to have them overnight when he gets back (I know he’ll be shattered and want to recover and get used to an empty house), but that they will need to see him, so I told him to call me when he’s home and ready on Weds afternoon and I’ll drop the kids over for a couple of hours, he can feed them and I’ll pick them up after dinner.
He’s then due to have them Friday & Saturday night of next week and I’ll pick them up on Sunday evening.
It will be really REALLY weird that first weekend – they will have been with me solidly in the house for a week (no school – it’s half term) then all of a sudden NOT there. By then the new place really will be like home for the three of us and it will be totally bizarre for them to go back to the “old house” or “dad’s place” as they are calling it now!
Plans for tomorrow …
- Get up EARLY and get us all washed/dressed and do breakfast for the kids.
- Disconnect the kids computers
- Pack up last minute stuff (dirty clothes, toiletries, hairdryer etc)
- Load all of the above into my car
- Wait for my neighbour with the van!
I feel so incredibly lucky that I’ve been able to have the keys for the last couple of weeks otherwise it would be a HUGE job tomorrow that would take forever to have sorted out! As I’ve been able to do it all slowly it already looks like a home and just needs literally mattresses for the kids, my bed and the washing machine – that’s it!
So anyway … my last night in the “old house” … it feels really REALLY weird. I almost half expect STBX to walk through the door and I have to keep reminding myself I am by myself now.
Weird … very weird.
I’ve had some interesting thoughts tonight too that I am not quite ready to share here yet … I don’t know yet if I will … this is way out there even for me!!!
I hate moving, I hate packing, I hate unpacking.
Good luck, I hope the last night in the house and your transition into single parenthood is as smooth as possible.
Luck luck luck!
Just remember how brave you are, and that you’re doing what you need to do to take care of yourself. Bravo to you!
I hope it’s going well, today. I’m thinking of you.
Em
Ohhh guys you know what? I’m knackered! It’s quarter to one in the morning – the kids were awake till well gone midnight and I’m soooooooooooo shattered but it’s all good!
I’ve had so many obstacles thrown at me today but nothing too huge that I couldn’t work round! My kids have been terrific too – I am SO very proud of the pair of them. I’ll post in the morning after a good nights sleep!